Today I have been confused; what to do now, when there´s only one day ahead before our leave. Yesterday we met my Mum and some other familymembers, I had a bag full of food from our fridge for them.
We had very nice chat but coming home we could not find tv-channels or any of the programmes we had put on tape (still using the old phrase). They changed something oddily with the channels and all and Hubbie had done all his magic before the odd changes, but apparently the other end did not react to his magic, so we had to watch Emmerdale re-run this morning.
I hardy ever watch tv daytime, it just is not my thing. I also try to do "real" chores all day long and if I fall into playing games at the computer or sitting with light reading, there must always be an explanation for me for that. I often feel quilty.
I have to start to remind myself: Hello there, you are allowed! You are on pension now, so you can enjoy of your life!
Easily said than done.
I have to do our washing, prepare food, re-prepare food, iron clothes - or write. Writing to me is not idlesness, writing is real work.
If only I could make myself to do the real writing, too. I have given myself an agenda of five manuscripts to be ready before I die.
The first one is on it´s way. 93 pages. But only 93.
Why is it so difficult to me to be lazy but equally difficult to do the only task I feel a calling for?
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